The Kangaroo

 

You've all heard of that classic Marvel villain "The Kangaroo", haven't you?

Alright, maybe you haven't. But if it makes you feel better, neither did Spider-Man before their first encounter.

What's the best way to handle a bad guy in high-tech battle armor? Simple! Strip it all off him and then hang him up like, as the indignant Kangaroo puts it, "a side of BEEF!"

(this was all in Spectacular Spider-Man #244 (1997) btw!)

Next issue we get possibly one of my favorite comic pages of all time. Let's count the ways:

1)The only clothes Kangaroo has on are a pair of boxers. Unclear if they're his own or if  Grizzly loaned him them.

2) Speaking of Grizzly, he's another minor Spider-villain who is extremely gay-coded every appearance he makes. True to form, in this ish he's basically adopted a naked hunk he found on the street.

3) They're talking weirdly homo-erotically about various humiliations they've endured. I love 90s tough guy talk.

4) Closeup on Kangaroo's butt as he leans into the fridge.

5) WHUMP! That kick!

This is the good shit right here.

Funny ha-ha "men getting prostate exam is the joke" humor or a wink and a nod that Kangaroo is now getting his ass regularly wrecked by Grizzly? You tell us, dear reader.

Sadly their love isn't to be, because they basically break up the following issue. We do get a nice cover of Kangaroo still in his undies though!

 But oh, what the hell. Let's show you some Grizzly while we're at it. Because who knew a skin-tight bear suit could look this good?

 With that out of the way, that's pretty much it for Kangaroo's most "fun" appearance. He isn't really in that many other issues, and when he is it's mostly just a cameo of him in prison because he, y'know, got arrested.

He is still looking good though, still keeping in shape.

In one story from Spider-Man's Tangled Web #16-17, he feuds with Tombstone. During the course of that he pulls the classic "creep through the air vents" maneuver popularized on television. Only, he gets stuck because he's too swole.

That's when the prison's femme gay population stumbles upon him and, well, whatever happens next is unknown because we have a scene transition. I think we can guess though. It was the not-politically-correct early 2000s.

Poor, poor Kangaroo...